Our Bodies, Our Stories
Mid-summer is here in all its golden, baking glory. The heat invites us—or forces us—to strip back the layers, and here by the beach - step onto the sand and expose our skin to the elements. When I sit on the beach, I am always struck by the magnificent tapestry of humanity. I see every shape, every size, every age, and every scar. To me, every single one of them is beautiful. When a body softens and simply exists in nature, its inherent beauty shines through.
But I know that for many, peeling back those layers brings up a tidal wave of vulnerability, judgment, and old, heavy conditioning.
We don't just inhabit our bodies; we carry our history in them. Our bodies hold our stories.
Inherited Shames and Shifting Illusions
I grew up witnessing a very different relationship with the physical form. My mother constantly shamed herself in front of me. She looked at her own reflection with disgust, fixating on cellulite and trapping herself in a perpetual cycle of restrictive diets. Decades of this have taken a severe toll on her health, leaving her with a sluggish metabolism. Today, unless she lives on around 1,000 calories a day, her body stores them immediately, and she is currently navigating the realities of being prediabetic.
Fortunately, seeing the prison my mother built for herself acted as a catalyst for me. Instead of inheriting her shame, I rebelled. I decided I simply didn't give a damn what people thought. I chose to be happy in whatever shape and size I naturally grew into.
Yet, society always finds a way to make young women feel small. In the 1980s, when I was a teenager in secondary school, curves were the coveted fashion. Because I was naturally very lean, I was bullied for being too thin. I remember trying to force myself to eat more, desperate to get bigger just to fit in and escape the cruelty of the schoolyard.
Then the 1990s arrived, and the cultural pendulum swung violently to the other extreme. Suddenly, the Kate Moss era took over, and magazines were filled with what the media called "heroin chic." Catwalks were populated by models styled to look emaciated, sick, and chemically dependent. The collective message was staggering: looking like a drug addict at death's door was the ultimate height of cool.
Even then, I saw the ridiculousness of the illusion and refused to get caught in the trap. Instead, my best friend—who remains one of my closest souls today—and I created our own reality. We hunted through second-hand shops, dressing in wild, retro, out-of-fashion styles. We used clothes to celebrate our uniqueness rather than conform to a sick societal norm. To this day, I still love fashion—but not fast fashion- and still buy second-hand whenever I can; thankfully, apps like Vinted have made loving pre-loved clothes easier than ever.
The Intimacy of the Flesh: Lessons from the Massage Table
Later in my life, I spent over twenty years running a massage practice and teaching students at several colleges and universities. Over those two decades, I met thousands of people, each carrying their own unique body hang-ups.
The spectrum of human comfort was fascinating. Some clients would walk in and get undressed immediately—completely free of shame, which was absolutely delightful to witness. Others arrived carrying such heavy armour of resistance and anxiety that they couldn't bear to undress at all. For them, I would adapt and perform the massage right over their clothes.
But no matter where they started on that spectrum, a beautiful shift almost always occurred. Usually about halfway through an hour-long session, as they finally began to relax and soften under my touch, their true beauty would emerge. I would watch the tension melt from their shoulders, a gentle smile touch their lips, and their breath drop deep into their belly. The whole body would simply relax and release.
That softening was possibly the most healing part of the entire experience: the simple, profound act of being touched with love, by healing hands, with absolutely zero judgment. It taught me that our physical forms are not statues to be critiqued but living, breathing vessels of our life’s journey.
Taking a Head-to-Toe Inventory
If you take a deliberate, mindful inventory of your body right now, from head to toe, what feelings are trapped in your tissues? Close your eyes and tune in.
Your hair: What stories live here? Do you love it now? Did you always? Did you spend years wishing it were thicker, curlier, straighter, or a different colour?
Your face: Look at your eyes, your nose, your mouth, your cheeks. Do you see lines of worry, or do you see the crow's feet that are the beautiful architecture of your joy—the laughter lines left behind by decades of fun?
Your torso and skin: Do you look at your belly with judgment, or can you look at your stretch marks and see them as sacred badges of honour—the physical proof that you are a proud mama whose body expanded to create life?
Your legs and feet: Do they carry you where you need to go? As I age, I catch myself occasionally noticing more cellulite as my natural collagen levels shift. But then I stop. I remind myself that my legs are healthy, strong, and active.
How much shame, pain, and criticism are you holding toward yourself right now? Has it influenced how you live? Has the fear of being judged stopped you from swimming in the sea, wearing the bright clothes you love, or showing up fully in your life? Have you allowed an industry built on your insecurity to define your boundaries?
The Poison of the "Perfect" Illusion
We have been systematically programmed from infancy to believe that youth equals beauty and ageing equals ugliness. It is a highly profitable lie. The global cosmetic and beauty industry generates billions of dollars every year, and the fuel that powers that engine is the manufactured feeling that you are not good enough.
Think about the arbitrary rules we swallow. When I was 18, I remember reading a book at a boyfriend’s mother’s house that explicitly laid out how a woman "should" behave. It boldly stated that a woman should only ever paint her nails red—never any other colour.
Personally, I detest nail polish. Conventional polish is toxic as hell. For decades, the industry flooded the market with formulations containing the "Toxic Trio": formaldehyde (a known carcinogen), toluene (a solvent that attacks the nervous system and causes dizziness), and dibutyl phthalate (a nasty endocrine disruptor that wreaks havoc on your hormones). Why on earth would we apply toxins to our bodies and poison our systems just because an author of one book once declared it a rule?
It is not real. It is just an opinion. And we do not have to subjugate our health or our sanity for someone else's nonsense. Look at what we have done to ourselves and the earth by believing the lie of insufficiency: we have poisoned our soil, polluted our bodies, and handed over our financial power (by buying this stuff) to a sick society, all in the name of trying to fit in and feel good enough.
Step 1: A Ritual for Release
It is time to take your power back. It is time to take your body back. If you are ready to stop domesticating yourself into a sick society with old judgments and find harmony with the skin you are in, I invite you to participate in a ritual of release, inspired by Toltec wisdom.
In Toltec teachings, every negative belief we hold about ourselves is an "agreement" or a contract we signed under societal pressure. To be free, we must break the contract.
Write the Judgment: Take a blank piece of paper. Write down the specific judgment or belief that has been holding you back (e.g., "I am too old," "I am too big," "My body is flawed").
The Act of Release: Demonstrate to your subconscious mind that this contract is officially void. Take that piece of paper and physically destroy it. You can safely set fire to it in a fire bowl, rip it into microscopic shreds, or let it dissolve in water and pour it directly onto your garden compost heap, letting nature transform that old energy into new life.
Write Your New Agreement: On a fresh piece of paper, write a new letter to yourself. Fill it with words of reclamation:
"I, [Your Name], choose to no longer subjugate myself to the false belief that my body is not enough. I reject what does not serve me. I honour my strength, my health, and my journey. I reclaim my personal power today."
If you have more than one belief to shed, take your time. Do one a day. Better yet, turn it into a shared event. Get together with a circle of close friends, hold space for one another, and perform this ritual in total support.
To hold the space for yourself or your group, you may wish to brew a pot of organic rose tea to invite in deep self-love, or prepare a warm cup of pure cacao to open the heart and ground the energy of the ceremony. As you share your body stories, let the tears flow if they need to. There is profound synchronicity and healing when we gather to declare that we are finally, completely enough.
These critical thoughts are not real. They only exist if we choose to keep them. Let’s free ourselves—because no one else can do it for us.
Step 2: Rewrite the Story—Connect to Your Divine Self
Releasing the old contracts is only the first step. When we clear out old shame, we leave an open space within ourselves. One of the best ways to shift our body's negative stories permanently is to actively create new, nourishing ones.
This brings us to the concept of the Divine Self—the aspect within all of us, regardless of gender, that acts as our ultimate internal nurturer. Many of us are exceptionally skilled at caring for others, but we completely forget to turn that tenderness inward.
To accelerate this healing shift and awaken your self-nurturing qualities, I invite you to make a formal commitment to a self-love ritual focused purely on honouring your physical form. If it feels awkward at first, even better—the more you practice, the sooner it will become your natural state of being.
Here are five powerful, body-centred practices to choose from to build your personal ritual:
1. Relaxing or Pamper Time
Give yourself a mindful self-massage using your favourite moisturiser, carrier oils, or organic essential oils.
Enjoy a warm bath infused with fresh flowers, healing herbs from the garden, or fragrant rose petals.
2. Positive Affirmations
Write out powerful affirmations and place them exactly where you will see them regularly. Sticking them to your bathroom mirror is incredibly helpful, allowing you to speak them out loud to your own reflection every morning:
I love myself just as I am today.
I choose to be kind to myself.
I love each part of myself.
I honour my life and my journey.
I appreciate all the ways that I am unique.
3. Cuddle Time
Create a sensory comfort space. Spend time curling up (on cooler days, with a soft, fluffy rug, cosy blankets, and a warm hot water bottle) to feel physically held, nurtured, and loved. Invite a beloved pet or a close, trusted friend to share the space with you if that brings comfort.
4. Dance Naked to Your Favourite Soundtrack
Put on a piece of music—I highly suggest “I’m Sexy and I Know It!”—and shake your booty like you just don't care. It may take a few goes before you feel entirely free of judgment, but dancing naked is a deeply energising, liberating, and fun way to completely reclaim your power!
5. Simply Say "I Love You"
Stand in front of your mirror, look directly into your own eyes, and say "I love you" out loud every single day. And mean it.
Summary
Make a definitive date—or a series of recurring dates—in your diary to honour your commitment to this loving ritual. Choose the physical actions that excite you the most, or perhaps choose the ones that challenge you the most.
Have fun with it. Notice how the love and respect you generate internally begin to ripple out into your physical health, your relationships, and your daily life. They say that laughter is contagious, and so is love. It is a real, measurable vibration. Let’s choose to vibrate more love into the world this summer, starting right at home with a commitment to ourselves.
Step into the sunshine, breathe deep, and remember: you are a living story, and you are beautiful.
I would love to hear what kind of self-love ritual you create. Please share your experiences and ideas in the comments below so we can all learn how to love ourselves more and heal our bodies’ stories together.
Are You Ready to Walk Deeper Into Your Power?
For those of you who feel the call to go beyond a singular ritual—those who are truly ready to find lasting freedom of mind, body, and spirit—I invite you to step into a deeper circle.
The next chapter of The Shaman’s Way is ready and waiting for you.
This is a sacred, 13-moon journey designed to help you awaken your inner shaman, dismantle the old societal contracts that have kept you small, and nurture your most authentic, liberated self. You won't have to walk this path alone; you will work within a tight-knit tribe of beautiful, benevolent beings, all moving forward in mutual support and shared synchronicity.
The entire journey is held and guided by me, Sorrell, as a dedicated Shamanic Teacher and Medical Herbalist with over three decades of clinical and teaching experience in this field. With gentle, experienced hands and deep wisdom, I will help you navigate your healing and reclaim your true spiritual and physical power.
Space is intentionally limited to keep our tribe intimate and potent.
